Just when you thought this marathon couldn’t get any more confusing, docile, mendacious, fantasy-riddled and hyper-cynical, it’s become all of them at once. Parliament is closed, negotiations are hidden, backstops and starvation are expected, and democracy is being defended undemocratically in stereo. HST Boris is off the rails, the Brexit blitzkrieg is stuck in the mud, Bercow is still in but will soon be out….and but one certainty remains: Leo Varadkar is a piece of work.

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It is a very odd thing for any European leader (let alone an Irishman) to suggest that there is “no such thing as a clean break from the European Union”. Being genetically 25% Irish myself – and sympathetic to ‘Ireland for the Irish’ – it does feel like ‘the Island of Ireland’ has a Taoiseach prepared to dismiss the epic struggle of the Irish People to escape British Imperialism as irrelevant history – by accepting what is obviously Ireland’s vassal status in the EU.

The universally quoted Hotel California lyrics do seem to apply here:

Last thing I remember, I was
running for the door.
I had to find the passage back to the place I was before.
‘Relax’ said the night man,
‘We are programmed to receive.
You can check out any time you like,
but you can never leave.’

But having made this quite extraordinary statement, Big Leo shocked us all with another one:

Well Leo, a majority of us wanted to leave on March 31st, but your Backstop collusion with Barnier plus a PM who sold out to Whitehall plus a Remainer Parliament that defeated her deal and then blocked no deal kind of got in the way.

But now he’s telling us what to do on October 31st. Whilst standing in the way of it.

Mr Varadkar is currently having his day in the sun: but once Brexit is settled, he will learn the hard way – as have Cyprus, Greece and Hungary – that the minute the slightest flicker of independent spirit arises in Ireland (as it did during their last referendum) the Irish individual – with all the creativity and contrarianism he or she possesses – will be flattened by the steamrolling anti-democratic process of the Brussels jackbooted bunion…..almost certainly led by the sort of spitting, raving insult fest in which Guy Verhofstadt specialises.

I am at a complete loss to grasp why ordinary Irish citizens cannot see what is obvious to their counterparts in the French gilets jaunes, the Italian Coalition, the Greek Opposition, the Hungarians, Brit Leavers and the new(ish) Spanish government, viz: the European Union is a neocon globalist wage-crushing capital bloc utterly opposed to any semblance of dignity or progress for labour.

I am not and never have been a Socialist. I am not and never have been a neoliberal globalist. I do not believe in collectivism and I do not believe in aggressively mercantile ‘free trade’, because both are the tools of remote, uninformed central control neo-colonialism.

These are all the things the Brussels bombasts, the Stop the Coup Rainbow, Wall Street, the City, Macron the former banker and Merkel the former DDR Jügendfüherin believe in. Other members of the brainless straight-line multicultural future club include Tony Blair, the Pentagon, Hillary Clinton, India’s CIA tool Narendra Modi, NATO’s point-girl Federica ‘Barmy Army’ Mogherini, and Goldman Sachs.

Thus, if you join up with these delightful folks, you may well be with the medium-term winners. But you will always be on the wrong side of history – an Oswald Mosley for our times, if you will.

I believe in people, and politicians who believe in the maximum fulfilment of every person in the community. I do not have any faith at all in megalomaniacs who like Big because it gives them a hard on or damp knickers, depending on what gender they present that day. Why would I?

Meanwhile, monetarist Philip Hammond and Marxist John McDonnell are united in their tough stand against dictatorship, and firm support for elective democracy. Of course they are. That’s why they’ve ignored 17.4 million votes, banned the People having their say at a General Election, refused to accept leaving the EU, and tied up the one man determined to Leave Now with or without a deal…because they believe in obeying the Will of the People. I mean c’mon, do try to keep up here.

Last week, Dominic Fukyeu Cummings told his dejected staff that “next week we are going to serve up some shit that will melt these bastards”. Confusing metaphors or not, I await these flying solids with breath suitably bated….but not held, as such.

The recurring problem lines up like this:

Too many UK Leftlib and Tory legislators want to reverse Brexit and stay in the EU

Too many UK Tory Leaver legislators want to quit the EU, but not if it splits the Tory Party

Too many in the 3% will do anything to block, bribe and bully Britain out of Brexit

Too many Remoanoid Brits are confused about what should be and what is

Too many Clean Brexit Leavers think they can take Britain out alone

Too many Parliamentarians are on a payroll dripfeed from Brussels

Too many British citizens are glued to too many news media that censor the realities of the EU in general and the eurozone in particular

Too many sensible UK citizens want to moan about the EU but do nothing about it

Too many alienated Britons believe the ballot box is a waste of time

Too many people haven’t read this essay:

The sleazy back-street abortionists working overtime to terminate the Brexit feotus

Carpe diem people, carpe diem.