‘The acceleration of desperation is directly proportional to tax constipation caused by austerity legislation, inducing exponential increases in the excavation of citizen wealth-creation once banker masturbation has produced bonus escalation alongside Treasury funds bailout liberation’.

Ward’s Law of Fiscal Desperation

George Osborne this week signed an information exchange scheme with France, Germany, Italy and Spain to catch tax evaders. As The Slog pointed out two days ago, Osborne could achieve all his ends and wipe out the National Debt if he simply raided those UK banks already aiding and abetting wholesale money squirrelling. But also in that Tuesday Slogpost, I concluded:

‘Stand by for an attempt by the Global Looters to use this tax evasion reality as the excuse for stealing the savings of everyone with over £100,000 in a bank account that isn’t offshore….and represents the life-savings of a law-abiding taxpayer.’

Mr Osborne and his fellow wealth-liberators aren’t after the megarich billionaires – the Presidential candidates, multinational CEOs, Trade Ministers, Wall Street Sherman McCoys, Sark lairds, Athenian Swiss bank devotees, media moguls and Bilderberger attendees robbing their governments blind on a 24/7 basis. They wouldn’t dare. No: the game plan is to smear anyone with a six-figure sum in savings, exactly as Schäuble did when neutering Cyprus. The objective is to make it OK for Sovereigns to steal from their citizens on a globalist industrial scale, by persuading the tabloiders that “the rich” must be made to pay. But it is the prudent who will pay: the seriously rich will escape…or be tipped off as necessary.

Vince Cable has been pulling this ‘big house = rich bastard’ stunt for nigh on three years – by referring to ‘mansion taxes’. No doubt the poor folks in Blackburn believe it, but it is still complete bollocks. The ‘Russian mafia’ rationale was an equally large mound of bullsh*t employed by the Troika to excuse the rape of Nicosia.

A number of commentators around Europe are now convinced that the sudden explosion of ‘leaks’ about offshore cheating was a coordinated event designed to blur the line between rich and crooked. I’m still unsure about this myself, but given that the amount of evasion has been obvious to me for at least seven years, it is rather convenient that all the media obsession with it has spewed out of the volcano just when every western government is strapped for cash and deep in debt.

However, there is one way for citizens (millions of whom are now bombarding financial experts and advisers with requests for help in hiding their stash from the looters) to delay the process of monetary mongeese snaffling the eggs in their nest. I propose a campaign called Start at the Top First (STATOF) and then a Tsunami of emails, website threads and phone calls suggesting the obvious suspects:

Mitt Romney, Evangelos Venizelos, the entire Hollande Cabinet, Lord Green, Rupert Murdoch, the Barclay Twins, Jamie Dimon, Lloyd Blankfein, Jacob Zuma, Robert Mugabe, Nicolas Sarkozy, Wayne Swann, Coke, Pepsi, Starbucks, Stephen Hester, Lord Mandelson….(insert name of the other 45,000 other candidates here).

If we are going to have tumbrils, guillotines, and heads in baskets, then let’s make sure we get Louis XVI rather than Alexander Dumas.

Earlier at The Slog: dismembering Greece, jailing journalists, and pulverising the poor