Every day, I read increasingly desperate rationales in the media – put forward by those who are motivated personally – and/or paid – to toe the line in terms of opposing any and all forms of financial regulation. They are of the highest quality as examples of creative invention, but utter bollocks when it comes to any kind of rational, empirical analysis. Indeed, if this amount of creativity was applied to actually solving our econo-fiscal problems (as opposed to explaining them away) a solution might be in sight. But the blind defence of what is becomes in the end indistinguishable from turning the blind eye to what could be.
So tonight I want to put a simple proposition to all Sloggers: why should financial services as a sector of commerce be the unique exception?
As I have written several times previously, the mere word ‘regulation’ is spat forth by the City of London and Wall Street chaps as if it might be a highly contagious form of Socialist leprosy. But the commitment of these idiots to The Golden Calf makes them oblivious to the many other equally vital areas of life where regulation is, um, equally vital. It might well be instructive to look at a broader professional world to which total deregulation had been applied.
Take medicine, for example. Imagine applying the ‘expertise’ level of the clowns running HBOS at the time of its implosion to the issue of surgical procedures. Triple heart bypass operations being performed by lobbyists, and complex intravenous brain investigations being undertaken by former market researchers…..my goodness me yes, what a splendid case history of deregulation that would’ve provided. Very much in line, really, with Mao’s Cultural Revolution, wherein peasants became doctors and doctors worked in the paddy fields.
Or the legal profession. How about a no-limits Court procedure under which every form of hearsay is admissable, and anyone can pitch up to a Grand Jury hearing with nothing beyond GCSE Geography with which to defend his or her client? You may think this parallel extreme, but if so you should think again: the four most senior directors of HBOS – during the period of its descent into obscene debt and taxpayer rescue – had not one single banking qualification between them.
Let’s have a deregulated architectural profession. Never mind all this tedious red tape about load-bearing calculations and proper foundations: this kind of crap is getting in the way of growth. Get the bloody project built, like they do in India….then we can praise the bravery of the rescue services as one small child is rescued, and the diligence of the police in arresting nine developers. What we won’t be able to do, however, is bring back the 79 people killed.
My own former profession of advertising was heavily regulated. Do I think it would’ve been a good idea to deregulate it? I do not: the business was full of reptiles who would’ve declared open war on the consumer the minute regulations were removed.
We’ve seen the way things are among ‘professional’ (but totally unregulated) politicians, have we not? Broadscale corruption, cash for questions, cash for access to Ministers, fiddled expenses….and then yet more fiddled expenses. Should politicians face exams and regulations? Yes – actually, I think they should. They should face serious examination on their knowledge of social anthropology, commercial experience, and Right from Wrong. And then they should be warned before standing that any dishonesty involving taxpayers’ money will be rewarded with serious prison sentences…not poncey open prison flower-arranging jollies à la Chris Huhne.
Does anyone remember deregulated Murdoch at work? Illegal phone hacking was Murdoch’s work. I don’t want press regulation: but I do want gargoyles owner like Murdoch out of the UK’s media offering for good.
If you want to know what a completely deregulated world would be like, then just go on the internet for half an hour. There you will find that free = expensive, unique = commodity, guaranteed = zero warranty, and hand-made = slave-laboured.
Not only should financial services not be the exception, it should be the main industry to be gone over with a fine tooth comb.
My message tonight for all those who would deregulate commerce in all media is this: first, re-engineer the culture so that people know how to behave. Then come and talk to me about deregulation.
The Slog 