The fundamental difference between the two Parties is that Labour invents tricks, and the Tories turn tricks

The strategically club-footed nature of Ed Miliband was predictably revealed this morning when comedy duo Osborne and Cameron extracted an agreement from four of the Big Six Chicago Mobsters energy suppliers to cut consumer gas and electricity prices – and keep them low until after the next election, as the government pledged to remove some taxes from consumer bills. (The use of italics there is to point out in case you missed it that all these con-men are clearly up for another Tory victory in 2015. So that makes one more vested interest to whom the Conservative Party now owes a debt).

But it gets funnier. Electricité de France (with whom of course Camerlot has no bargaining power whatsoever) said they had “already anticipated” the move and therefore would not be reducing prices. Very gallic that one. And Scottish Power is keeping its powder dry, presumably waiting for instructions from Slippery Salmond.

So Ed, bang goes another election trick….and quite frankly chum, you have only yourself to blame: opportunistic buying of votes when you’re not in power always leaves the way clear for those who are. But you’re right, dear readers, it’s all very grubby, and demonstrates yet again that they have no ideas beyond amateur prestidigitation. I could live with Tommy Cooper running Britain, but neither of the Eds are funny, and poor old Tommy’s dead.

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Yesterday there was no phone at Slogger’s Roost, now there is no internet. But good usually comes from bad, and as a result of the “intermittent” supplies of France Telecom and Orange, I have now become a regular at Jean-Paul’s Bar des Sports, where the hot chocolate is of a high quality, and the wifi is free. So this may be the last you hear from me today.

Earlier at The Slog: There’s a good OBR and a bad OBR….OFFICIAL