In the light of contemporary insanity, your favourite proverbs have been revised:

The squeaky wheel gets sold to EDF        Bob Diamonds are forever

The grass is always greener when the Chancellor presents his Budget

When the going gets tough, the tough get richer    A fiend in greed is a fiend indeed

When in England, don’t do as the English do. Do something.

Two wrongs make a Coalition                 A little knowledge is a politician thing

The pen is mightier than the sword, but not the GCHQ/ISP axis

People in glass houses should learn the difference between shit & putty

Birds of a feather flog the citizen’s wealth to the highest bidder

There’s no place like home when it comes to surveillance

The sleazy turd catches the trickle-down wealth

Buggers can be choosers from any care home they like

If it ain’t broke, privatise it    A Gove by any other name would smell sweeter

Practice makes perfect, and legal practices destroy the Law

Bite the newsfeed they hand you, and don’t swallow it

If you can’t join ’em, beat ’em

You can judge a paedophile by his cover

Good things come to those who turn up

Two Eds are better off gone

If you lead a horse’s-ass to water, he’ll piss in it

 

A man’s gotta do what a woman tells him to do 

and of course, the one that remains unchanged:

A fish rots from the head down