ANALYSIS: The odd art of talking Balls up.

“Oooo, you lickle liar”

You may have noticed over the last week or so that various usually right-wing persons have been heaping praise upon the head of Ed Balls, and opprobrium upon Milibands D&E. In almost every case, ‘let’s get the Nutter elected’ is showing beneath the hemline of most of these articles – especially Boris Johnson’s in the Torygraph yesterday. But there is also a slightly naive element to some of it.

This naivety has allowed some commentators to get their word-lexicons a tad confused: thus ‘boorish, ill-mannered bully’ has become ‘tough, uncompromising operator’, while ‘cloth-cap, 1970s-Left drivel’ has become ‘harsh critic of austerity’. The truth remains simple, however: Ed Balls is an uncouth, nasty, bigoted man whose ideas have as much relevance to the 21st century as Louis XVI’s had to the 20th.

Specifically in relation to the emerging new economics, his views can be aptly summarised as balderdash. This is particularly true of his ‘plan’ for deficit reduction after stimulation has created the money to repay it. Ed Balls, astonishingly, thinks the first priority is to save jobs.

Being unable to think sequentially beyond next week, Mr Balls suffers from the illness afflicting all those in academia and on the Left: he thinks saving jobs can generate money.

Saving jobs generates but one form of money: that which arrives fresh from the TUC into Labour’s coffers. It generates nothing else other than more belief that everything’s alright really, when it quite clearly isn’t.

“Ah but ah but,” yell the Balderdashers, “stimulating the economy produces manufacturer confidence, and that in turn saves jobs. That’s what Ed really means”.

No it doesn’t and no he doesn’t: stimulating the private sector creates productive jobs: it doesn’t save jobs – especially those in the public sector. What Ed means is saving jobs so he can stay the right side of Unite on account of them not liking him as much as Ed Miliband.

Out there in the Insane New World so easily embraced by Ed and his ilk after 1997, there are market-makers, Hedge Funds, currency dealers and credit ratings agencies. They call the shots in 2010: I don’t think they should, because they are mainly mad/greedy/crooked/wrong, and often all these things. But that’s the world we inhabit, and to these folk you have to demonstrate willingness to repay the money first…after which come the jobs, via a process of economic restructuring.

It doesn’t work the other way round. It never has. Trying to make it work the other way round helped get us to where we are today – saddled with a bloated civil service and the fruits of years of waste.

In the States, Barack Obama put into practice what Ed Balls is suggesting. It was too little too late and too one-directional over there. It would be too much far too late in the reverse direction over here.

To paraphrase Lord Mandelson, “You really must stop taking Ed Balls up”.