The rotten borough of Rotherham: update. I’m told that Nigel Garage is a little upset about the way the postal votes got counted at last week’s Labour by-election ‘triumph’. And I understand a prolific psephologist on the scene was somewhat surprised by the margin of Labour victory. But I’m sure it will all blow over.

Is Tory MP Rob Wilson about to look an even bigger prat than he actually is? Conservative Rob ‘Angryperson’ Wilson was part of the cleverly coordinated stampede getting behind the McAlpine bandwagon when his Lordship announced two weeks ago that he had no idea how the life-shattering and inaccurate allegations of paedophilic tendencies had come about.

Rabid Robbo sent a jolly stiff letter to Tom Watson telling him that his ‘sensationalist’ allegations about Ten Downing Street micro-orifistas were baseless tosh meriting several concurrent life sentences. In this Diary of a Nobody missive, Wilson noted that the Labour member should ‘be sure that you can fully substantiate allegations yourself before making them in public’.

Oh dear, Rob. The House of Commons is not ‘public’. It is ‘protected from litigious old gits public’. What other people make of things said within Commons Privilege is their affair….yourself included, Ducky.

Do try to keep up. And – a little word to the hopelessly unwise – I think it might be a very good idea for you to remain low-profile somewhere without phone access during the next two to three weeks.

Bashar’s Last Stand in Syria? The Middle East tonight is rife with rumours about what Bashar Assad might or might not do with his chemical weapons stash. We should all bear in mind that every time the Americans want to take someone out, it is standard disinformation procedure to suggest the adversary has an arsenal of ICBMs that could be launched at a minute’s notice to vapourise New York.

Bear in mind that – as with Saddam Hussein – there has never been any verifiable proof that Assad has such weapons. However, what is clear is that – while accounts of his imminent defeat have long been exaggerated – the rebels in Syria would now have to try very hard to lose this one. Stay tuned: this story is going to get higher-profile in the coming week.