At the End of the Day

ScreenHunter_88 May. 29 21.24David Boyle, a government adviser and fellow of the New Economics Foundation think tank, said today that the average house price will reach £1.2 million by 2045, putting a home beyond the range of most people as wages fail to keep up with huge increases.

Or put another way, Mr Boyle is a Cupid Stunt.

Whyohwhyohwhyohwhyohwhy do the plagues of Boyles in our world keep on churning out this tripe in the face of overwhelming evidence that Henry Ford was wrong? That is to say, it isn’t history that’s bunk: it’s the future.

A gentleman working for Southwark Council in 1888 wrote explaining to his superiors that if current trends continued, London would be knee-deep in horse dung by 1927.

But yer see, thassa fing wiv yer current trends, roit? They don’t bloody continue.

In the year 2045, I will be 97. I think it highly unlikely, however, that I shall be extant. But if current trends continue, I will be, because I’ve been in a continuous state of Life now for some 66 years. So that trend is bound to continue, innit?

Futurology – every last useless hour of it – is based on the profoundly wrong assumption of eternity. But in a Time and thus events-based Universe like what we got ‘ere in this one, there is no such thing as eternity. Eternity Rights do not exist. History – yes, bizarrely, history – dictates that the future will not be as predicted by f**kwits who have never gained the primary learning form history…viz, it never, ever turns out the way predictors think. This might have something to do with the fact that predictors think only in straight lines. And if there is one thing Time isn’t, it’s a straight line.

But anyway David Boyle, let’s take your MO in the area of predicting stuff, and apply it to see if it is any more seaworthy than an ocean-going bicycle.

If current trends continue, in 2045, the Pound will be worth 8,430 euros.

If current trends continue, Prince Harry and his wife will have 17.7 children by 2038.

If current trends continue, the value of global derivative trades will be 1.4 million times the value of the real world economy by 2028.

If current trends continue, the Chilcot Enquiry Report will never be published. (Actually, on reflection I wouldn’t be at all surprised).

If current trends continue, UK Opposition Leaders will be consuming 365 bacon butties a year by the third millenium

If current trends continue, Western governments will be doing nothing whatsoever for the citizens by November 2015.

If current trends continue, futurologists will be more influential than bankers…but the date for this keeps moving further into the future.

Closely related recently at The Slog: Past promises and futuristic fantasy