Britannia and the Lion
There’s a last resort Belgians call Bruxelles
that’s noted for hot air and lies
And Mr & Mrs Great Britain
went there with the stars in their eyes.
A fine feast was laid at the table
in Nineteen and Seventy Five –
there was growth, there was fairness and freedom
where every dream might arrive.
They marveled at every promise –
the federal objective was small
there was no central bank and no Euro
in fact nowt much to laugh at at all.
So seeking for further amusement
they voted to stay in the zoo:
there were tigers and elephants everywhere
and ruddy great lions too.
There was one Euro lion called DeLors
and an Aussie tabloid called The Sun
whose headline told Jacques ‘Stick it up yours’
and oh how we laughed at such fun.
But soon there arrived Margaret Thatcher
who promised material glee –
a neolib golden egg hatcher,
who doubted this new EEC.
At first Maggie’s outlook was so strict
they dubbed her the Lady of Iron –
but sadly she signed up for Maastricht,
her head in the mouth of the Lion.
You could see that the lion just loved it
for giving a bit of a roll
he pulled Britain into the madhouse
and swallowed its sovereignty whole.
Mr Britain had clocked the occurrence
and read the entire Lisbon text,
So he told his wife, “Lion’s ate our freedom”
and Mrs B said, “Ooh yer know, I’m that vexed!”
But then came the patriot Farage –
a bloke who had spotted the con.
He treated the Sprouts to a barrage,
and poked the eyes of Cameron.
And so there came a referendum,
and wise Britons voted to leave –
but now there’s debate neverendum
from hidden rats up every sleeve.
Their hero is Baron Adonis
our traitor is Theresa May –
but where they are both quite at one is
they’ve got nothing useful to say.
So Mr & Mrs Great Britain
tell Remainers who haven’t a clue:
“Get theeself down tert Tigers’ enclosure
And see what them buggers can do”.