US ELECTION SENSATION: Paul Ryan, whatever happened to Barry?

Dear UK Sloggers born before 1955

I’m so happy (as you must be too) that the late British singer Marion Ryan’s twin son Paul is to be the Vice-Presidential running mate of Rintintin Mormon. This is Paul Ryan (left) in 1965:


…and this is Paul last week:


As you can see, his haircut has moved on, but his face is – miraculously – little aged. My suspicion is that somewhere in an attic near you is a painting of his twin brother Barry that looks about 163 years old. But I could be wrong.

You see – and this conspiracy theory is a lulu – the man in the White House is also called…..Barry. So here at The Slog, we asked a make-up artist and plastic surgeon to collaborate on the construction of what a blacked-up Barry Ryan might look like today. This is what they come up with:


Well I don’t know about you, but if that isn’t Barack Obama singing Al Green two years ago*, then what is?

This will, of course, bring a whole new dimension to the American foreign-imposed elite theorists: one Marion Ryan twin will be replaced by another if Mitt wins…but whatever happens, one of these wicked demons will be in the White House.

Did you know, by the way, that Joe Biden has three sixes behind one ear, and shaves his scalp-horns down daily…..

* The last shot above is in reality Barry Ryan singing on a French TV show three years ago…in negative.