All Good Gifts around us are sent from Heaven above: but the bonkers plonkers are hard at work down here in Hell removing all physical, three-dimensional Truth from our lives while inventing every possible sabre-toothed monster and impossible hermaphrodite to keep us scared and confused in perpetuity. It’s a nightmare for most of us, but a potential humour glut for satirists.

Take, for example, the physically impossible (without mengelean deranged intervention) concept of a bloke giving birth after nine months of gestation – short only of a womb, birth canal, placenta, hormones, maternal instincts and sanity.

So the visual to the left earned a warm welcome from me, in that its idea of Gender Neutral Tampons was not only mordant, but also sub-headed with sufficient irony to demolish the mad self-indulgence of transism….be it Davos broad or sexuality shallow:

JUST FIND A HOLE AND HOPE FOR THE BEST

Those still attracted to the idea need to think on the holes available: two nostrils, two ears, a gob and an anus. Each has its pros and cons, given that a vagina was the preferred design outlet until very recently. This doesn’t raise many high hopes of improvement, but let’s not get too depressed about it: this is, after all, cutting edge science. Maybe not the best choice of words there. Sorry. But hey, if a Gay dick or confused ferret can get up an anus, probably a new baby can get out.

Often the most important element of a cartoon is it’s ability to use seven words not just to replace fifty paragraphs about sapiens idiocy, greed, idleness and pomposity, but also to encapsulate the perversion of a noble aim. The one above presses all the buttons for me. The expressionless face of the health bureaucrat is sheer genius in its demonstration of the camouflaged pharmaceutical salesman who has undergone both a soulectomy and the suicidal destruction of his right brain hemisphere.

Compare and contrast this bomb thrown from the barricades with the utterly risible output of Number 1 toady Establishment Times “cartoonist” Peter Brookes. The reason his propaganda feels so plonky and leaden is that he toes the line and thus offers Janet & John interpretations that aim for the lower end of Mob opinion. Hilariously, for thinking folks his aim is so untrue, he winds up shooting the excused-boots flat feet of his slave-owners.

Sometimes, Amateur Night contestants on marches and demos (often for some reason, Geography teachers) don the appareil of the human cartoon in the vain hope that this might make them appear witty.

In the case of the lady to your left, it comes across as the sadness of abject desperation and witless commentary.

Her unconsciously brainless grin is, however, admirable by comparison to the millions of £s squandered by Nicola Sturgeon and her fellow muff-divers in Scotland, who somehow (above right) managed to buy a plot of land for commercial forestry that was, um, as it were, totally unsuitable for, errr, commercial forestry as such.

Ponder for a few seconds the total salary cost of those who advised the slippery sturgeon on this £25 million venture. Then ask yourself how many of those hidden McLacklusters will be fired as a result. A few seconds is all you have to take, because the inevitable answer is NONE.

In fact, why not instead spend some amusing hours laughing at some of the impenetrable jargon of those Silicon-slick plonkers advertising their wares on social media. This example involves the function to be gained by using UI – something I assumed until yesterday stood for Useless Intelligence, but in fact means User Interface.

In fact, user interface (UI) is the point of human-computer interaction and communication in a device. This can include display screens, keyboards, a mouse….and the way through which a user interacts with an app or a site.

This ad offers a way to make it “simple and intuitive” – which would be fine if you didn’t think that the use of such words had already been compromised by their own gobbledygook description of what most of us do every day.

Either way, ask yourself this vital question: do you want to manage your backend like a breeze? 164 connections say you do, but I’m damned if I know who those lamentably sad fuckers are. On the whole, I drink rather too much beer…and without doubt, that sends strong breezes out of my backend.

But isn’t that just theft of ancient cultural communication? Isn’t it the sort of “cultural appropriation” that the BLM narcissists go on about ad nauseam? And above all, isn’t it totally unnecessary complication to make their 5th rate technology look better than the thinly disguised web virus it really is

Time now to point the sickly slammer of Slog at our new Monarch. It seems that all attendees at his Coronation scheduled for May 6th this year will be subjected to the password/digital eye/human test procedure in order to be sure that not a single Bot terrorist has 3CPO is his sights.

Much of this example of unearned privilege may seem flippant until one remembers that the Proper Charlie is historically unique in the power which will accompany him as King of whatever the UK is by the time he dons the Crown of Thorns.

Be clear about this: Charles III inherits the position as head of the ruling Windsor family as the only incoming Monarch in history who has given the Royal Seal of Approval to all three of the Secret State institutions now quite clearly out of control in my homeland: MI6, MI5 and GCHQ.

Check it out.

And so finally we arrive at what I suppose many of us have been expecting while at the same time praying that it wouldn’t get this desperate.

With the propagandistas now running out of terrifying threats to do with health and climate, wags on Twitter have been joshing each other about little green men with big heads and skinny arms, although it was probably just Anthony Fauci.

But be careful what you joke about, because the guys wearing scrambled egg hats and crewcut-cool shades don’t have a sense of humour as such: merely a sense of opportunity. They never let an urban myth go to waste.

As it happens, I do believe that intelligent aliens exist (the odds are overwhelmingly in support of that) but it stretches my credulity elastic way beyond snap-point that they’ve suddenly turned up here just when the military – surveillance – banking complex has run out of viruses, exploding coffins and melting ice-caps.

Anyway, yesterday the White House “ruled out” any indication of aliens or extraterrestrial activity after the United States shot down a series of UFOs this month. Still, nihil desperandum, they’ll probably turn out to be weapons of Chinese Mass destruction so natch, we have to go get those Yellow bastards before it’s too late.

So it’s jolly important that Britain rejoins the EUNATO alliance properly by reversing Brexit. I’ve been saying for months that, as long as the New World Order Blairite-to-Frankfurt sociopaths are in power, it’s going to happen. GBN seems to agree.

I wouldn’t fancy Dan Wootton’s chances of staying in employment after coming out with this rant: he’ll probably wind up being The Third Man to be silenced at GBN. The British Establishment simply cannot bear the idea of the UK having a truly independent economic and foreign policy. It’s one of the many reasons I retain my belief in the likelihood of a National Government sooner rather than later.

Such a Government will perhaps be formed to combat the Real and Present threat of China bombarding Britain from the air with unsold garden lights, oven hobs that explode and fridges that play pretty tunes when the door falls off.

Today is St Valentines’ Day…..

I asked Google to find a heart-shaped image, and this is what it came back with. Isn’t Artificial Intelligence a wonderful, heart-warming thing to behold? Doesn’t it just inspire you with how great, autistically robotic and altogether brirriant life’s gonna be when those of us left have opted for tin transition in the World according to Schwab? Dunno about you, but I can hardly wait for the day when the 14th February becomes the Winter Offal Feast of Good King Klaus von Davos.